Wednesday, 17 October 2012

I am such a Wus!!

I think I tend to come across as quite confident in a lot of areas of my life. My eldest munchkin is the same, but underneath it we are both blithering wreaks!

If we analyse it a little the situations we maintain our confident cover are all familiar; we know the people, we know the places and we know what we are talking about.

That is very true of the munchkin, however I am a little more of a complex character (the other half will testify to that). Since starting my new job I have done things that I have never even attempted before, surrounded by people who I don't know. I have faced my nerves and achieved things I never thought possible. I am always confronting things that terrify me for the benefit of my babies and my family too.

However, I have spent all week dithering over doing just one thing for myself. It just means facing something new alone. Aha, here is the key to me! I hate to do things alone, especially for the first time. Don't get me wrong there are times I need a little alone time, but in these moments I choose something safe, somewhere safe, somewhere comfortable. Historically when I have come across something that scares me, is just for me but I cannot find someone to do it with, I have always given up. Just rolled over and allowed the fear to swallow me whole. Oh I can pull it out of the bag when someone is counting on me, I can even fake an air of confidence, but when I am the only one that matters I would much rather disappoint myself. Sometimes you just need someone to hold your hand and make sure you don't fall!

I guess the question is....will I pull it out of the bag for myself? Or will I retreat and give in?

6 comments:

  1. I am the same way! When I am trying to convince myself to do something for myself that scares me, I either try to think of a way that it's really for my family or I pretend that I already know what I'm doing and that I'm with a friend inside my head. Sometimes it works. :) Go! Do! You can write about it later if it's awful.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Lol, I have friends in my head all the time ;-)

      I bit the bullet and it wasn't awful but I may still write about it. It's nice to know I am not the only one!!

      Delete
  2. I'm always talking myself out of things....I curse myself for it! I always worry I'll fail before I even try...it's a terrible mindset to have.

    Having read your above comment though it sounds as though you went through with it! Bravo! :)

    I also just wanted to drop by and tell you that you're one of my nominees for the Reader Appreciation Award:

    http://oystercardjunkie.co.uk/blogher-nablopomo-challenge-month-reader-appreciation-award/

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. How stupid is it though that I talk myself out of doing something simply because I have never driven there before!!

      An award, I like awards :-) Off to check it out :-)

      Delete
  3. Good for you for biting the bullet. I'm sort of the opposite, with this. I generally enjoy doing things by myself, but if others are involved, I let them take charge. It's hard for me to hold hands.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The holding hands is all about letting them take charge for me because otherwise I am like a scared little girl! Sad but true!

      You'd hold my hand a crocodile line though, right? (do you remember these from school??)

      Delete

Penny for your thoughts

PS Thanks for taking the time to stop by